I Miss You Like Hell

My eyes find yours in a distant place.

They are all that I can seem to understand;

Such a beautiful--fading--shade of blue.

I wander into my uncanny commitments,

But then only back to your eyes.

There was something there--

You were so handsome, and so strong

As you stroked the side of my cheek.

I might have loved you if I hadn't known

That your eyes were still dancing with hers.

And now, I've adapted to the midnight calls

And that things "simply cannot change",

But I can't stand looking into your eyes

And only seeing her face.

Your touch is electric--simple--and pure,

Whispering to me such sweet nothings.

You are far too much for my unsteady self.

Simply, I miss you like hell.

Ineffectual Keeper.

Entrap me, ineffectual keeper.

I hear you whimpering the word, "forever," with such delicacy.

Whimper for me one more time.

I've been anticipating your presence for longer than is ever healty to my addictive mind.

You have always been the brave one,

Looking straight into me while I bundle up this bouquet of lies.

Let's dance for just another hour and look at the clouds.

Can you see our tomorrow?

I just might have forgotten how.

Instead, just keep laying out this bittersweet timeline of honesty and electric happiness.

Was that last year or today?

Please don't let me forget this time.

You're leaving me with empty serenity and I can't help but fantasize of a hinting happiness.

I cannot seem to figure if you're feeding me insight or pity,

But at this point I think I'm all right with either.

All this jovial talk is making me hungry for another photograph, a new one.

You're getting my hopes too high, gazing at my hopeless eyes.

The galaxy is getting smaller with every stalling second.

Running away seems like the best option.

Running away from your protection,

Your faith, your tranquility,

And now, you seem to appear as the only solidity I have left.

Don't curl your fingers against mine, I beg you.

You look handsome, walking away now.

I wish you luck, ineffectual keeper.

I love...

Loyalty. Nature. Simplicity. Hope. Rooftops. Adventures. Change. Finding exceptions. Family. Friendships. Writing. Spirituality. Introspections. Sensitivity. Morals. Humor. Children. Animals. Spontanuity. Creativity. Dance. Activism. Chaos. Romance. Excitement. Deep converstaions. Politics. Rain. Sabrina Lake. Cheerio. Poety. Passion. Color. Smiles. Vegetarianism. Hedgehog. Asking big questions. Paintings. Literature. Autumn. Invisible Children. Gay rights. Inspirations. Faith. Commitment. Honesty. Tea. Peace. Stars. Strength. Edna St. Vincent Millay. Memories. Meditation. Culture. Intellect. Anthropology. Success. Peace Corp. Laughing. Parks. Eloquence. Imagery. Singing. Joy. Patience. Imagination. Curiousity. Disneyland. Tim Powers. Old horror fims. Yellow. Lightening. Admiration. Late nights. Eyes. Attics. Daydreams. Dedication. History. Respect. Fairytales. Dreamcatchers. Intensity. The moon. Mountains. Long walks. Impressions. The Ybarra family. Crafts. Charisma. Beauty. Miracles. Hummingbirds. Early mornings. Open mindedness. Spring. Petnames. Regrets. Hugs. Exploring. Wonders. Clouds. Mythology. Privacy. Intruments. Forests. Youth. Freckles. Possibilities. Deepness. Mischief. Naivity. Mirrors. Home. 1969. Realism. Realizations. Conceptuality. Sleepovers. Journals. Nightmares. Words. Treasure trests. Mysteries. Sarcasm. Freedom. Communication. Teaching. Learning. Belief. Wit. Trees. Fear. Relaxation. Thinking. Being alone. Pomegranates. Debating. Corners. Concerts. Journalism. Libraries. Collaging. Adrenaline. Stamps. Songwriters. Fallen leaves. Afterlife. Waterfalls. Documentaries. Chocolate. Psychology. Impulsiveness. Lycanthropy. Dressing up. Life. Spinning in circles. Gerber daisies. Sunshine. Doodling. Closeness. Locked doors. Leaders. Wishing. Philosophy. Lullabies. Description. Tattoos. Talking. Rugby. Impacts. Indian reservations. Dances. Anticonformism. Curly hair. Independence. Vibrance. Pride. Healing. Roses. Road trips. Decisiveness. Happiness. Silver. Whistling. Sharing. Second chances. Black sheep. Escapes. Shells. Incense. Records. Roller derby. Languaged. Masks. Redundancies.

To be continued.

December of Reddened Leaves.

You could call it only a ray of sunshine,

You could, I would only ever suppose.

Most would only suppose simple light.

I felt your smile within eloquent prose.

~

Your dance of weariness remains so faint

As I still glare towards your unfaithful eyes.

Most would only dance in shades of grey.

I felt your terror forming endless lies.

~
You could call it only a reddened leaf,

You could, I would only such remember.

Most would only remember the sun.

I felt your distance of that one December.

~

Your song of trespassed hearts sings so heavy

As you continue melodies through snow.

Most would only sing of the emptiness.

I felt your warmth what feels long ago.

~

You could call it only a drop of rain,

You could, I would only begin of a dream.

Most would only dream of cruel pretentions.

I felt your kiss, or so it may seem.

~

Your painting of despair speaks of our truth

As I draw through your untouchable face.

Most would only paint of perfection.

I felt your sanity to always chase.

~

You could call it only blooming flowers,

You could, I would only hope in romance.

Most would only hope within thse blossoms.

I felt your faith only begin to dance.

~

Your script of scribbled bliss returns once more

As you write of such a wandering journey.

Most would only paraphrase elegance.

I felt your beauty with a solid yearning.

That night and you.

That night was bitter in its simplicity,
overwhelmingly so.
I crave to whisper thousands of words to you,
only returning
with thousands of disagreements.

That night was beautiful it its complexity,
twistedly so.
I cannot forget your scent of comfort
and sweet smoke.
I do not think I could ever forget you.

You are terrifying in your felicity,
perfectly so.
I have long since known better
and should know better,
yet I may just always return.

You are charming in your toxicity,
handsomely so.
I touch your hand with a faint smile
that will only fade by morning.
I never could forget you.

Subdue.

Screams of silence become her curse.

A tale of lonliness can only emmerse.
Her hands are shaking and she's ready to scream;
Intense pain becomes so suddenly surrene.

Her lips tell of yes; body screams of no.
You see her running yet never let go.
Her legs are trembling and ready to leave.
Is she truly worth the nothing you receive?

Shallow thoughts overwhelm to mind
As her secrets begin to slowly unwind.
Her head is pounding; body ready to run.
Unable to find the path to your sun.

Her darkness concurs into your empty bliss
As you explain of all she let herself miss.
Her lips are aching and ready for you.
With your kiss, she must never subdue.